Dear A.M.

If you only knew how much I cared.  Its killing me seeing you with other people.  I think I have you all to myself but then you brush me off like Im nothing.  It isn't fair the way you are treating me and I need to learn how to love myself enough to stop it.  But how can I love myself any more than I love you?  I wish there was a book of answers that could make my choices for me.  Until then Ill listen to Dashboard and pretend like every day isn't the worst day of my life.

Love,

A

the summer of boredom is continuing.  i've begun knitting again.  i've quit sudoku, for now.  babysitting and capannaris.  heres a little story for you kids.

mmmm two weeks ago i was babysiting.  the older one was at camp so i just had the younger 8 year old.  he wanted to go to the pool with one of his friends and im like sure!  before we left im like, hey mom, how much supervision do these kids need and the mom i babysit for was like oh i read my book and i look up at them every once and a while.  then i talked to the other mom and she says oh i dont even watch them they are really independant.  im like wow your a bad mom but then we were off to the pool! so the kids throw their towels behind a huge umbrella and im like whatev.  so they are swimming and i can see them and they were not going to get stolen on my watch.  then the friend comes up to me and hes like the life guard needs to see you.  buahhh!  we walk over and hes like do you know where i live and im like hey kid who was the one that picked you up of course i know where you live.  when we reach the life guard hes like address and im like blah blah blah, i look down and im like DID YOU GET RESCUED!!!!  apparently he was playing flush the toilet.  its where you spin around and then hit the bottom of the pool.  he was pretending he was a rat being flushed down the toilet so he was yelling HELP HELP as he was playing.  im like do you think its a good idea to yell for help in a pool and hes like nooooo.  what a frickin idiot.  i dont feel responsible hes 8 and doesnt even know his address. 

alright, i off to my nap. you all have great days!!!

bout time for another entry i guess.  i am finding the groove of summer and its alright.  i decided that summer is not my favorite.  i hate the weather, the heat and sun suck.  im way to pastey for this weather.  i like my fall, winter, and spring clothes better.  what three more months til fall.  well i can wait. 
i think in need to stop eating icecream or i need to start working out. im going to buy new jogging clothes, that will give me some inspiration..... okay maybs
im reading "the passion of artemisia" and im loving it! shes living in florence right now so i get my map out and follow the streets that she walks down.  ho nostalgia!
and finally, bonfire season is upon us! we logs for days and the grass is cut.  if you want some give me a call!
alright you have great days and ill get back to you in a months time! byee

yes, i am still alive.  i am wasting my life away this summer.  wireless internest you are the bane of my existance.  and the icecream store.  its not that bad, just a life sucker.  this week i have much to do, i need to write some peeps some letters, clean my room, get my painting in order.  i have so much stuff to do this summer, what am i doing doing nothing?

mmm whats going on at home? well if you havent been in the country then you wouldnt know about... american idol? naw i only saw that once and the guy i fell in love with got kicked off so i dont care.  this is why i dont xanga, cause then i realize how sad i am.  i think i should make cookies.

hey i saw the da vinci code.  and no i didnt replace the code for the bible.  it was alright, just really long.  i talked too much during the movie, i need to rent stuff.  speaking of renting stuff, saw brokeback moutain which was hilarious.  i just wish i hadnt watched it alone, luckily i relayed my own personal commentary to australia via aim.  good times.  i suggest it.

so dont tell my brother but i offered to work for someone for his graduation.  im doing one guy a favor, but i wont be able to see my baby brother sit for 3 hours and then get his name called second to last cause hes a frickin wilkinson.  darn.  i guess theres always katies graduation i can look forward to.  my siblings stink.

with such little school left i couldnt possibly do all the things i need to do.  when did 20 page papers become such a fad i ask!  if i can get some of that done this week i should be golden for the end of the year.  if all i had to do was school stuff then i would be overwhelmed, but i have art stuff on my plate as well which is keeping me grounded.  im going to be in two shows this weekend! art club on friday and im showing work at caribou in my home town on saturday. i think they frown when you have wet paintings hanging on walls so i need to get those done pretty darn soon.  im not going to the spring event but i didnt go last year.  weird.  i didnt go last year cause i was visiting my sister, and now my sister is commin home this weekend.  thanks sis!  now that my prof cancelled class for the rest of the year i need to go be leisurely.  you go be leisurely too!

and remember: together we fall but united we stand!